When You Can’t Get Caught Up…

The weather this week is spectacular. Bright blue skies with a few puffy white clouds. Mild temperatures and almost no wind. Daffodils and tulips are blooming daily and the trees are turning green and putting out blossoms and new leaves everywhere you turn. We’ve been out walking and riding bikes, puttering in the yard and soaking up as much vitamin D as possible. It’s funny how I crave spring. I’m a warm weather girl to the core and now that milder weather is (hopefully) here to stay, I’m happy!

Easter was lovely and hectic and go, go, go. This season of little kids makes it hard sometimes to slow down and enjoy the holiday. Much time and effort is put into creating traditions and special moments for them and all of a sudden in the midst of the hustle and bustle, the day is over and you forgot to really enjoy it.

Spring break is over and we are back to our regular schedule. The house is littered with toys and dust and laundry piles. There never quite seems to be enough time in the day.

With spring comes house projects. We installed a new slider door a couple of weekends ago and that has evolved into new trim and painting and it just keeps going…not to mention the yard, and pots and the absolute compulsion to buy seeds or flowers every time I go near Home Depot. It’s a sickness I think.

Jack is changing every day. I wish I could accurately put into words how awesome this kid is. He is funny and kind and helpful and independent. His stories are hilarious and even the endless sometimes mind-numbing questions point to how inquisitive he is. He loves his brother and only torments him some of the time. He loves school and is really getting the hang of writing his name. He surprises us almost daily with the things he is learning, singing songs in the back of the car and recognizing letters and numbers.

I feel like I’m bragging, and maybe I am (I guess I can, since he’s my kid and this is my blog right?), but he is just such a delight. And don’t get me wrong, this isn’t to say that we aren’t constantly disciplining and guiding, that he doesn’t have absolutely brat-tastic moments and at times, a complete lack of impulse control. But they are just moments. And most of the time I see this interesting, loving, happy little boy and it fills my heart to bursting.

And Lukey…oh Luke,  all blonde shaggy hair and dimples. He is at that maddening stage where he has more confidence than skill. This means endless bumps and bruises and lots of crying. He tries so hard to keep up with his brother and it kills him to be left behind for any reason. He is still my snuggler, often curling up with his blankie and his thumb for a break in the chaos. He loves stroller rides, pushing his lawnmower, reading books and playing with matchbox cars. He still talks in mostly gibberish with a handful of words spoken clearly. It pains me to see him growing up so quickly but I love the bond forming between these brothers.

At my bible study yesterday, we were given a passage on joy along with a quote by Kay Warren that really stuck with me:

Every day of your life, wonderful, good things happen that bring pleasure and contentment and beauty to you. At the exact same time, painful things happen to you or those you love that disappoint you, hurt you, and fill you with sorrow. These two tracks — both joy and sorrow — run parallel to each other every single moment in your life.

For me, that’s motherhood. The joy is huge. Every day, moment after moment is filled with it. But that doesn’t mean that mothering and all those joy-filled moments aren’t sometimes hard, difficult, exhausting and defeating.

And then this…the hope that joy brings:

If you look down train tracks into the brightness of the horizon, the tracks become one. You can’t distinguish them as two separate tracks. That’s how it will be for us, too. One day, our parallel tracks of joy and sorrow will merge into one. The day we meet Jesus in person and see the brightness of who He is, it will all come together for us. Then it will all make complete sense.




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